To Kresten:
All I have to say, now that I am to
think upon the matter once again, (for there never really goes by one day that
I don’t think upon it) is that you have some neurotic nerve to accuse ME
of harbouring self-interested motives in a matter where the facts themselves
already speak so boldly in my favour. YOUR actions produced a situation so
infernally corrupt that I could not have dreamt it up, much less produced it of
my own accord. I need not even make a claim against you, since the only verdict
is so unequivocal. Even our modern stories must abound with men, of higher
quality than even I am, who contend with you and people like you. No rational
adult would dare say of such a man that he merely pursues his sovereign
interests at the expense of his competitor, nor that he’s moved by envy, like a
crab within a bucket, whenever his own good will is stepped on by his lesser
brethren. All the World is allied with me, though it may not know it yet, for
it sleeps in its own false awakening,
and all the facts themselves, God’s Very Truth, protest against you,
whether silently or given voice by saints and scholars. That any decent
standard SHOULD favour me over you, rather than letting the scales swing your
way, is unequivocal, incontrovertible, and obvious. My every minor failure, as
well as each disappointing victory, both now serve as a reminder from my God
that nothing will atone for what you’ve done until YOU have atoned. Even
success itself is an escape, as well as its pursuit, for Life Itself is
shameless when Her Life is mute. I should have had the dignity to watch you
crumble silently into despair. I but did you the courtesy of voicing what you
were too blind to see, and you, so addled in the mind, would not face facts,
for you had fabricated far too many lies, believing you could paint the Halls
of What Must Be to look like What You Have Created. The record shows now that I’ve
NEVER USED ANOTHER TO MY PRIVATE PURPOSES, nor will I be accused of doing so by
YOU, of all the damned who walk this Earth. My purposes were always civil,
public, and insured. My moments of private despair should have been mitigated
by a Public Justice.
Dmytri.
[({Dm.A.A.)}]
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