SCORPIO SEASON: A Private Letter Made Public.

[777 Words. Sent sometime earlier this month, either last week or this one. Most probably the Sunday of our last missed date.]

SCORPIO SEASON:

It was hard on both of us. We are just extremely sensitive people with a lot of trauma. It was wise of you, I hope, to have decided to spend this time apart, so as not to tear one an OTHER apart. My only reservation is rooted in fear, fear that I was too swift to come to your aid. That you needed some one, but I had all ready been pushed away. That you found someone else to help you. That you found someone else. I can’t do that tragic situation again. But thankfully my Heart tells me I will not have to. And I trust you. You would not have shut me out if you had been unable to handle it. You would not have been vainglorious as to think that you could handle such a challenge on your own, if you couldn’t. You know yourself. More than you think that you do. Or than you let on.

There was a lot of karmic baggage to unload. I feel cleansed. Sagittarius is coming on. I just finished an other story arc of Breaking Bad with my Mom. I am in suspense for watching the beginning of the next. I tried to make sure she would be as well.

You are what I am looking forward to in THIS Life. Not unlike the end of a story arc, the upcoming Cusp of Revolution brings us to the beginning of my Favourite Four: Sagittarius through Pisces. And we start with YOUR element! Hazah!!

I want to celebrate this New Season in Life with You. Pardon my Element and All Its Pain. You’ve weathered worse Novembers than this one, I am sure. We both have. We know our coping mechanisms: Family and friends. Pensive introspection for me. And an all-you-can-eat Buffet of Activity for the Lady. Hearts.

I really believe that we will pull through this, Nicole. You know my Heart now, inside and out. I need not vent much more to you. The time for Enjoyment has come. Take me or leave me. Scorpio teaches us: All or Nothing. I am done being a Pushover.

I believe that you owe me a chance.

But I’ve not heard YOUR side of the Story yet!!

Know that I will always support you. My word is my bond. A promise is a promise.

Just don’t leave me in suspense.

And since we’re shedding our Scorpions’ Shells, I’ll just shoot this right at you like Cupid’s Flaming Arrow:

If you start to see someone else, I will begin saving up for an Engagement Ring.

I love you, Nicole. And I want to get married before I turn thirty.

Maybe that’s just Jupiter making false promises. It IS Thursday, Day of Jupiter, right before the First Cusp of Sagittarius, after all.

But perhaps it’s something more profound.

Perhaps it’s all so Pluto reminding me that, in my Heart of Hearts, I know just who I am and What It Is That I Want.

I suppose that all of this is fairly disquieting (or all TOO quieting?) to a typical Intuitive Extravert afraid of Commitment.

But I don’t doubt you’ve wanted this. If not with me, then with someone else. Yet I am all you have now. If I may sound a little vain myself. Or if I may puncture your vanity. Or if I may simply be so bold. I really want to believe that I Matter to You. I hold a Special Place in Your Heart and play a Pivotal Role in Your Life.

We both have Cancer in Midheaven. Or was it Midheaven in Cancer?

We just might be each other’s Cure for Cancer.

A fair chance is all that I am asking for. I’ve earned that. And you taught me to Value Myself. Thank you. I don’t believe my Gratitude for you will ever die.

And neither shall my Love for You.

I can let you Lead the Way. You would want to. You can help me onto my feet. Just give me a direction and I will go. So long as it is WITH you. You give me Direction. You give me Hope, as well as immediate and total Satisfaction with the Present. I would be a fool to give you up. What more can one ask for? It is the best of BOTH Worlds: Childhood and Adulthood. Capricorn and Cancer. Our Troubled Pasts and Redeemed Future.

And I know that I will be able to reciprocate. Yes: I say “will” instead of “would”. That’s the Archer talking. And you, the Champion of my Heart.

Forgive me. Please.

I love you, Nicole.

It gets Better.

Dm.A.A.