Accordance:

I know now the nature of this new disease.

I am in love again.

I let my doubts in myself cloud my Vision, prompted by the distant past.

The dead are deadening to me. Yet Her Ghost haunts me with beneficence, reminding me that Death is Not the End, filling my Heart with pity for those who so callously scorn Life by fearing Death, or even by embracing it as though it had been Absolute.

I still remember: we are here to learn Unconditional Love.

That is why I am not afraid to be in Love with this new Angel that has fallen before me.

Every step in this direction, including the cultivation of my manhood, is a painful one. But knowing that my passion is yet pure, and only from this standpoint of true purity might I have seen the impurity of my enemies, I know that never shall I now become them. My attempts to understand them proved to me that I was not their Equal. God had all ways barred me from that sort of sin, even when my will erred. And His Love is greater than my peers’ vanity, however pity might cling me to them.

They know not yet what His Name Means. But it is nothing short of healing rain from endless Heaven. And it’s all ways walked beside me, and within me, and beyond and all around me.

I can beat the Heat.

Whatever shape this Love takes, whatever crevasses the healing rain must fill, I welcome that, just as I welcome now that love that narcissists and Satanists won’t understand.

It is not an addiction, and it is not pride. It’s not possession, and nor is it jealousy, though they might flank it. It is rather what I felt when I forgave Alanna, and by forgiving her absence I cut distance down to presence.

Only evil lies would have obscured this Love.

Neither is it fanaticism. It is rather the budding of Being within me.

And it’s no self-fulfilling, selfish Prophecy.

My Journey continues. I shall bring the rain and light to all I can. I have the Boon. I’ve Seen the Other Side. It’s time for me to come home.

But first I must have another Meeting with the Goddess.

Dm.A.A.