Dream Journal Seventy-five.

What immediately resurfaces is the  extensive episode with John Lara.  We were at asocial gatherng of some sort, if not a school function or, as is most likely, a compulsory scholastic event such as a class or course.

The dream was one of the most vivid and ornate dreams that I can recall having had recently.

Its imagery  was  also markedly dark,as though it werea returntoand of the  miresand, in fact, terribly amoral confinements of being an atheist in early high school.

 

John kept offering me psyche-delic mushrooms. He was part of a sizeable group of maybe half a dozen ofhis peers,or so. The chief wing  manmust have been Bobby Sharp.

 

The  event had  been a party, yet  a pervisive dogma of scholadtic rigour seemedto overshadow the event. I had arrived at the event under the presumption that,were I offered anything, I would take it. Yet I became  wary.As we sat in the room of a building that looked like something  with the austerity of the Emperor’s New Groove but the brisk,gentle wonder of the Ice Trial level in Atlantis,the Lost Empire,I asked him about what the possible ramifications and detriments of a ‘ bad trip’ would be. He was deceptively vague as to the effect and what I wouldsee. It was near that moment that my sanity was aggressively challenged.

I shrunk away from John and his fellow stoners in Fear,for each one became menacing to look at. John’s eyes in particular seemed to portend the horrifying  solipsistic impression that everyone’s eyes were  merely  amirror for my own true identity, as though their behaviour could never be trusted because they were all merely fragmented forms of Me whose volition was merely a manifestation of their own confusion,which was really simply My self - deception.

 

I would not believe it,with – drawing into what I knew from Buddhism of the Anatman principle. Yet all my rationalizations and The serenity of my logic could not assuage the terror of everything dissolving and my seeing, as  one dream  character had put it, that ‘ every – thing is One Thing .My companions continued to pester me.Finally, I snuck away from them,but John and several others followed me, catching up after some  time.

                        dm.A.A.